Skip to main content

The silver lining

If you've been reading me for a bit, you probably will have realised that my last few posts haven't exactly been all happiness and light. They've been dark, morbid and downright depressing and I've been gloomy and depressed for a long time too.

Until today that is; I was just reading my blog and looking back over the last few conversations I've had with friends and I realised what a sad, sad person I've become.

I'm turning into the kind of person I've always hated. Whiny, pessimistic and a wet blanket. And it's such a departure from my usual happy-go-lucky, optimistic, easy-going, up-for-anything self. I've lost all sense of spontaneity. I'm not as laid back as I once was. I take offence at the tiniest of offences. I get anxious over little things. I'm quick to lose my temper and slow to make amends. And I've never been that way ever before.

So as of today, I've vowed to be much happier and try to come out of this terrible place. And in my quest to improve myself, I decided this blog needed a new look as well. Not that dank, depressing blue. So here you have it, the colours of fall, a touch of gold and a smile on my face every time I view my page.

I also solemnly swear that I will kick my own ass every time I go down that same route. And I will try not to change my template again for another month at least.

P.S: To GB, for all that you are and for all that you mean to me, in borrowed words, this is my wish for you: Comfort on difficult days, smiles when sadness intrudes, rainbows to follow the clouds, laughter to kiss your lips, sunsets to warm your heart, hugs when spirits sag, beauty for your eyes to see, friendships to brighten your being, faith so that you can believe, confidence for when you doubt, courage to know yourself, patience to accept the truth, Love to complete your life.

Comments

Sunshine said…
i love the template...its a very serene happy...like uve come to terms with ur unhappiness and decided ud rather be happy abt it!

lol ok i dunno if that sentence makes sense...

i do believe tho that happiness is a state of mind...u can choose to be happy or unhappy no matter the circumstances!
Sankoobaba said…
always be happy... be it good times or bad...
coz bad times happen for gud reasons...
i call it evolution...
keep smiling...keep blogging..
YES!! That's teh attitude girl....and write happy stuff :) it lifts the mood.

love this color....please dont change your template for a while :)

Popular posts from this blog

Remembering Avanti

Day before yesterday, on the 8th of November 2008, Avanti Desai would have turned 21. Instead 15 days before her birthday, as she hurried home to celebrate her grandmother's birthday, Avanti met with a train accident at Jogeshwari station.

Just like that. Gone from our lives forever. Leaving behind a huge void and the world a lot more gloomier.

And when I got the call first thing in the morning, I couldn't believe it. I thought it was a cruel sadistic joke, but as the calls kept coming in, I realised it was true. Even at the cemetary,, it still hadn't sunk in that Avanti was no longer here. The worst moment though was watching her disappear into the crematorium, it was horrible and I couldn't believe we were leaving her there, and through the next couple of hours all I could think of was of her going up in smoke while we stood there in the bright sunshine.

It seemed incomprehensible at first, to think of Avanti as dead, to talk about her in the past tense, to get used…

The Roaring Twenties

So here I am on the eve of my 30th birthday, my very last day of being 29, just about 4 hours left of being a twenty-something.

A couple of years ago, I remember snidely chuckling away to myself, when a favourite blogger of mine turned 30, believing that it was so far away, it could never touch me. I'm regretting that now.

And to be honest, I thought I would be okay, I really honestly truly believed that I would be greeting this new decade with a casual insouciance and indifference that would normally be characteristic for me, but I'm not. I'm terrified of how quickly my twenties have zoomed by and how little I've accomplished and perhaps that is what is upsetting me.

On the cusp of another decade on this planet, well, I feel like a bit of a failure. No, scratch that, I feel majorly like a failure. I'm drowning in self-pity and anguish at wasted opportunities, at thrown-away chances, at my inherent laziness and procrastination, at my never-ending ability to put of…

Lady of the Cake

I've been wanting to blog about my recent interest in baking for a while, well if you can call three years recent, that is. But I've always wanted to talk about the joy that baking brings me and how much I enjoy it. The calories, not so much.

By nature, I am a rather random person. I don't function very well when neatness and precision is necessary. I like to think of myself as a big-picture person. Not for me the analysing of every detail and the nitpicking and the perfectionism. But it is precisely this side of me that baking, the exacting science that it is, challenges and I actually revel in it. There's something about creaming exactly 100 gms of butter with 50 grams of sugar and mixing in 300 gms of flour. Measuring, measuring, measuring, beating, whipping to create a cake that is so much more than the sum of its disparate parts. The exacting nature of baking allows me to put my vagaries aside and focus with a 100% on the job at hand that pleases me. For someone …