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Showing posts from August, 2007

Forgiving and forgetting

Relationship... relationships.... such complicated shit !!! Why is there a category who must always feel that they are better, much better than anyone? why cant people live a simple life...? and why must friends be stabbed by so called friends? and why must this category of person be so convincing? They play with your feelings and you see yourself with doubts! You don't want to lose a friend, they are so important in this fucking life!!! But there are times when forgiveness is no more of actuality!!! when you know deep inside that you will lose it forever even if there is still love & friendship...... Because it will ruin you And why why am I still ready to be friends with that person ??? Why am I still trying after a week of not speaking ??? Am I just a glutton for punishment ? Do I love getting hurt again and again ??? What is it ?? I dont know if the person will feel betrayed. I dont know the feeling, but i know that it will surely hurt and i dont mean evil, i strived

Sports in my Heart & Soul

Every time I tell somebody I want to be a sports journalist. They wonder why. Why a girl wants to do sports journalism? Why I'm not interested in maybe Page 3 or fashion journalism? What do I see in sports? And more often than not, I'm stumped for words. I really don't know how to explain to them about how much I love sports. About how its an integral part of whom I am. Of how my life's blood is sports. Of how it's imprinted on my heart and engraved in my soul. It's a tough thing to explain. Especially to those people who've never played a sport. I've played basketball all my life and I can't remember ever not loving it or imagine not being into it. No matter how busy I am. My life revolves around it. I'm constantly looking for information on what's happening in Mumbai, the national level and even the NBA. It's why I go to watch tournaments even when I'm not playing, so I can appreciate the skills and talents of other players who are

Flavour of My Hands

Yesterday after a long long time, I ate food with my hands. Typical South Indian food. Rasam, Sambhar, Rice and some kind of beetroot vegetable. It was hard. Really hard. And if I had a choice I would never ever have done it. But now that I did it, I'm glad. It was a novel expereince. I felt extremely connected with my food. Something I never feel when I eat with a spoon. Weird but true. It was fun too. Pouring sambhar over the rice. Picking it up in my fingers and watching half of it fall of again. Struggling to put food in my mind without biting my fingers off. Watching my friend laughing as she watched my incredibly bad attempts to eat. And also sensing the smirks of the other diners and waiters in the restaraunt But as I walked out of the restaraunt I felt full. Not just with food but an inexplicable sense of pride at what I had accomplished. I'm going to eat a lot more with my hands now. Maybe not regularly but atleast once in a while. Just so I don't lose my touch.

Of Friends & Memories

These days I find myself analyzing my relationship with my friends a lot. Of how much they mean and how I would be totally lost without them. I can't even begin to explain the wonderful feeling I get when I'm with my friends and we're all laughing or talking over something. It makes my heart glow to realise how much I love these people and how my life would be totally empty without them. I enjoy the whole process of making friends with people, of watching memories being formed. Of how random talks or messages or online conversations can be so incredibly fulfilling. The feeling I get when I wake up one day and realise what a big part of my life they've suddenly become. Who knows what will happen 10 years down the line whether we'll still be friends or even know where the other is. Its a sobering thought. But I'm not going to think about it too much now. I'm going to revel in every smile, cherish every hug and treasure all the late night talks and memories. G

60 years of Indian Agriculture

Agriculture has been the dominant sector in the Indian economy accounting for 18% in the GDP and 60% of the population is employed in agriculture. India is second in the world in terms of farm output and despite a decline in its share in the GDP, it is still the dominant sector of the economy. In the 1950’s productivity in India was low due to illiteracy, general economic-social backwardness and slowness in implementing land reforms. Other causes were fragmentation of land and inadequate irrigation facility. However this changed with the advent of the Green Revolution with the yield per unit increasing. This happened due to the emphasis placed on agriculture in the five year plans and steady advancements in irrigation facilities and technology, the use of modern agricultural practices and agricultural credit. The realization that food security was of paramount importance led to the implementation of the Green Revoluti

An Ode to a Mountain

Lofty peaks rising up to the sky Caressed by the clouds, kissed by the sun, Dusted with snow How many tales to tell, How many mysteries to unravel Unparalleled beauty, Incomparable strength Rivers and lakes, Forest and deserts, Slopes and valleys, Sentinels and Protectors Jewel in India's crown Guarded and armed, Revered and respected, Holy of Holies House of mortals, Home of sages, Abode of Gods, Witness of the past Testimony to the future Statement of the present Many mantles, one mountain *inspiration strikes during the bus ride on the Leh-Manali route*

Sands of Time

A giant bowl of sand, Varied, Vague Ever changing, Forever Moving, Giver of Life, Taker of Breath One minute there, Next second gone Easy to guess, difficult to predict Impossible to conquer, Illusion and Reality all in one * A spur of the moment poem I wrote on the trek from Diskit to Hunder in the Nubra Valley in Ladakh*

Relationship Weirdness.

Sometimes I just like to sit back and take stock of my relationships with people. I'm not a vindictive person by nature and I don't think I have ever really cut anybody out of my life. It's just not me. I've tried to but I just haven't been able to do it for very long. Even if I'm right, I'll still be the first to call and break the ice. Sometimes I hate myself for it but most of the time I feel that "who cares who makes the first move as long as we're friends again." I can't bear to see one of my friends ignore me or not talk to me. My relationship with some of my friends is filled with drama. We're constantly arguing, fighting, banging the phone down on each other, swearing we'll never talk to each other again. But after a little while, we talk again and I love that cause these people are like me. Once something is done with, they move on and forget what happened. About forgive, I don't really know. Sometimes though the revers

Murder Most Foul

She stood, a small figure in front of the school notice board. With anxious eyes she searched for her number. It wasn't there. The girls around her jostled and pushed. There were screams of delight and shrieks of ecstasy. She turned away from the sounds of laughter, tears, streaming down her face. Far away she heard the same laughter turning into jeers. Suddenly she felt imaginary eyes on her back and voices. "She's dumb. She failed." " She was never any good." "Remember in class, she sat with that stupid look." She turned and walked the stairs to her now empty class. In the eerie silence she heard the laughter of clasmates and then her teacher's voice , " Can't you do your homework like the others do, you'll fail if you go on like this." How was she to tell the teacher that she had not understood a thing the day before to have been able to do her work at home. " Stand outside the class will you, let the whole school know

Mindless Ramblings Of My Mind

I dont have to remind myself that this is my space, I can write any amount of bullshit out here..just to satisfy myself, but lately I'm having problems talking about my own problems, rather.. facing them also..forget writing about them...that doesnt mean i can stop writing..i could go on and on rambling, maybe its a part of me now. Though rambling doesn't really make me forget issues that mess my mind up. Maybe its just me. I take things in the wrong sense. I'm over critical. I'm sometimes stupid --speak without thinking. I'm horrible in sticky situations or those which demand me to be forceful and I totally completely think too much. About everything. What, when, how..! If i trust someone i fear I'm being taken for a ride, if i don't i fear I'm losing out on something not worth losing. Yes yes i can already hear u loud enough--im sure some of u are saying--she needs a break. i know i do. but i cant even seem to get that planned out, without worrying abo