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How important is honesty?

My oldest friends perhaps are the ones from the areas where I used to live. They've known me for a good 8 years at least now. Inside and out. Everything there is to know.

If I call them in the middle of the night, I know they'd be there for me without thinking about it twice. They've pulled and pushed and prodded me. Made jokes. Laughed with me and at me. Cried with me and for me. And have been the best friends I could probably ever ask for.

But at no point have they ever lied to me. If I've been in the wrong, delusional or brought something down upon myself. Not once have they hesitated to tell me that I'm at fault.

And what forms the basis of our friendship is honesty. Brutal, painful honesty. Which sometimes listening to is hard, but when you think about it is absolutely right. We never shield each other from the truth.

And while this may seem harsh, it's not. Sure it's not always pretty. But its necessary.

And I wouldn't expect any less from any friends of mine.

Which brings me to the entire point of this article. I've carried on this brutal honesty thing to all the other friendships in my life and that is a lot. As far as I know, 99% of them are okay with it. But one person isn't.

A friend of mine can't deal with this honesty. She feels that I'm not supportive enough as a friend. And that sometimes I need to keep my truth to myself.

My argument here however is, that if I don't speak my mind or if I don't say what I think what kind of a friend am I? In my eyes, that ranks as a very crucial failure on my part.

I always believe in saying whatever I think is right and true. And if someone is out of line, I'm not going to hesitate to speak the truth. It's as simple as that in my book at least.

And my speaking the truth doesn't mean I'm any less supportive or loyal. Not in my book. Because even if i tell my friend that she's wrong. I'm STILL her friend and I would still stand beside her whatever she chose.

I just wish she would get that.

P.S: Happy Birthday, Moo!! I'm terribly sorry for not calling and wishing. *Hangs head in shame*
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Comments

Mynie said…
You are what you are... and your friends must accept you as you are. If they don't well... tough luck... Let them get over it! Just be yourself.. and things will fall into place
24 March 2009 at 17:46
Anonymous said…
Oh thats horrible. Why dont you tell your friend that you are supportive no matter what you say...maybe the friend will understand. Or give it some time.... things will improve.
31 March 2009 at 14:33
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